Pricing It Up: Katie's Next BIG Thing

massive bulge in grey pants

Is that a marrow in your pocket or are you just...oh forget it! 

 

Katie Price isn’t having the best time of it of late, most recently breaking both her feet and ankles whilst on holiday in July. Well, now she’s off on another beach trip and it looks like she’s having a good time in more ways than one.

 

It’s often said that she’s bankrupt or is running low on funds and needs to sell her house/car/children. Ok maybe not her kids but it is about time they started earning. Either way, if you’re looking for a budget holiday that’s fun but isn’t going to break the bank then why not try the Maldives? Oh wait… hang on a minute.  

 

Holiday romance

 

Whilst galavanting on the stunning tropical coast, she posed for some playful pics with new fella Carl Woods. At 31 he’s twelve years her junior and you’d be forgiven for doing a double take. Clearly she has a type and this isn't the first time we're written about one of Katie's beaus. In fact, you can read an in depth interview with ex Kieran Hayler right here and an homage to ex Kris Boyson here too. Don't we spoil you!  

 katie price wheelchair casts carl woods

Carl stands, or rather crouches, by his woman

 

This time though she also added a snap of him in a pair of grey shorts with either a semi or just a big cock outline nestled between his legs. She claims not to have notice the bulge in the pic as she’s just ‘used to it’ but we find that hard to believe.

 

It’s time to face the truth and tell it like it is. Katie Price is a size queen. Presenting the latest evidence of current boyfriend and potential father of future children, she then claimed he was the ‘biggest she’d ever had’. While in various papers this comment has been called ‘disgusting’, she’s just admitting (not for the first time) that she likes guys with big dicks.

 

The bigger the better 

 

Pretending that she hadn’t noticed his gargantuan bulge in this pic is obviously somewhat far-fetched as every picture these celebs put up is studied with a fine tooth comb before posting. Here, however, she is also adding an extra ‘fuck you’ to her myriad of exes by claiming he’s the biggest.

 

katie price carl woods blag clothes neon nails

'You're not going ANYWHERE' Katie's new victim/beau Carl

 

Getting married and having kids is Katie’s bread and butter, or at least it used to be when people were more interested. The world has moved on from such audience manipulation and whilst it used to be cute, people are now aware of being cogs in a system they’re not bothered about.

 

Take the X Factor as an example. The show had been haemorrhaging viewers for years even before it was furloughed this year due to the pandemic. The format had grown tired but more importantly the public had become indifferent to it, developing fatigue at the way they were being manipulated.

 

Formulaic

 

In much the same way, Katie’s antics have worn thin and she’s become something of a figure to feel sorry for whereas before you could at least applaud her business savvy and self-promotion.

 

Cut back to today and she’s whipping up the same old story again, a younger guy, a bigger dick, a desire to have even more children. Let’s hope Carl is her forever boyfriend or else next time she’s going to have to go even younger and even bigger… and that just sounds painful.

 

Sam Dowler

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